Finally. Someone asked me to join their club. Even better, it’s a BadGirlz club!
I’m so happy to be a part of the Bad Girlz blog, and I can only hope I don’t get kicked out for my goody-two-shoes ways. I mean, I do cuss–LIKE A SAILOR–but I also sing in the church choir. Then there’s the fact that I teach Sunday School, and I used to teach high school. Even worse? I’m the daughter of a teacher. We all know teachers’ kids and preachers’ kids go one of two ways. Yeah, I was the straight and narrow kind.
I want to be a bad girl. Really, I do, but I fidget when characters in books and on television are making stupid decisions. I have been known to actually yell, “Make good choices!” Oddly enough, they never listen.
Then there was the time in my misguided college years I tried to dress up as a hooker for Halloween. I think I was the most conservatively dressed person there. I used my own closet instead of going to a costume store. Heck, now you can be a sexy ear of corn if you want to.* I mean, you can. I’d probably come out looking like the farmer’s wholesome daughter.
I did take pole dancing lessons. In related news, I still can’t dance much less dance sexy.
Maybe my novel is about a bad girl? In The Happy Hour Choir, Beulah swears and plays hymns in a bar. That’s pretty bad, isn’t it? Then she falls for a minister. Hmmm.
I did skip class once with my bestie from high school! Kinda. Okay so we technically had permission to be off campus for a yearbook photo and the daring thing we did was go through the McDonald’s drive thru WITHOUT GETTING PERMISSION FIRST, and I was the one driving. Then we sat in the auditorium lobby and ate McDonald’s instead of going back to the cafeteria. *gasp* Then one of our teachers and the guidance counselor found us and told us we were going to be suspended and lose our Valedictorian and Salutatorian statuses and we would RECEIVE ALL ZEROES FOR ALL THE DAYS WE WERE ABSENT. And my life flashed before my eyes! And then that teacher and the guidance counselor burst out laughing because they were playing a cruel, cruel practical joke on us. Janette and I were not amused.
I’m not as bad as Janette, though. She’s the one who tore one of those “Do not remove” tags off a
hotel pillow once. I know because I was there.
You know, I’m trying. We went to Coyote Ugly a few years back, and I tried to dance on the bar. I couldn’t get to the bad because the place was so crowded.
I did get a speeding ticket right before Nationals in Atlanta. That’s pretty bad, right? What? No. Oh, okay.
Oh, hey! I wore a corset to Moonlight & Magnolias that time. That counts, right?
Fine. I guess I’ll have to stick to cussing as my major vice although I did drink straight from the champagne bottle on my fortieth birthday so maybe there’s hope yet that I’ll learn to be bad. Maybe all these BadGirlz will rub off on me.
Stay tuned for some posts with writing and reading and whatnot, but in the meantime I’m going to try to get a handle on this being bad thing.